In my upcoming book, Automatic Influence, I write about a Houston prostitute named Jenny. . .
In a 2015 television series on A&E Network titled 8 Minutes, a Houston pastor and a team of former prostitutes offered working girls an escape.
Pastor Kevin Brown posed as a John and invited prostitutes to a hotel room for a trick, then switched things up with an intervention. He and his team offered a new life—with food, shelter, social support, jobs, and rehab.
The team knew they had about eight minutes to convince girls to escape before the pimp showed up.
As I watched this series, I was amazed at how many girls wanted to stay in the life. Yes, they wanted to stay in the life. They refused the pastor’s offer.
Take Jenny, for example. She refused Pastor Kevin’s offer, because she saw good in her situation. “I’m happy with my life, because I’ve got a good pimp now,” said Jenny as they recorded her on a hidden camera. “He gave me a bank account and doesn’t beat me like the previous pimp.”
Most people would believe Jenny’s in a bad place, but she sees herself in a good place. There’s a lot of evil in her situation, but she doesn’t see it that way. She sees good things in prostitution.
When we see a situation wrong, we can feel happy about the wrong things.
The way we perceive a situation automatically influences the way we feel about it, which automatically influences our behaviors. Everything starts with the way we see. There’s a natural progression from perception to emotion to behavior I call the See-Feel-Act progression.
When we see a situation as good, we automatically feel happy about it, even when our way of seeing things is wrong. So if we use our sense of happiness as a compass, but never check whether we’re seeing things right, we can feel happy about the wrong things. Consider how teenage boys feel happy, ecstatic even, as they break into a house and smash all the mirrors. Or how a man might commit adultery and break up his family in the name of happiness.
Happiness isn’t an indicator of true goodness. It’s an indicator of perceived goodness. So if our perception is off, our sense of happiness will mislead us.
I’m all for happiness, as long as it’s for the right things. The pursuit of happiness must work hand in hand with the pursuit of true goodness.